"You've always been a bit of a conundrum," is what was said to me about a month or so ago, in reference to my personality or just my way of existing. A hard code to crack? Me? Really? As I pondered this statement, I began to like it and accept it. I think the reason I like it is that it's the perfect word for describing me. I also like it because it gives me a simple response to those who would ever ask me to describe my own personality. Multiple words and drawn out explanations never seem to do the job.
Careful observation is the best means by which one can get a clue to solving the riddle of Bryan Hollomon Williams. I'm not a "talk about it" kind of guy, so through action and through my writing, I expose my heart. Even then, only those blessed with the right eyes are able to see the method behind the madness of me. Can something be simple yet complex within the same three seconds? I think life itself was created to be simple, but we complicate it, refusing to accept and live by its simplicity. It's as if we treat life as we would a question we've determined to be a trick due to how easy it is, basically confusing the hell out of ourselves. "It can't be THAT easy," we say. The recipe says cookies, and we are pulling cakes and pies out of the oven, proud, happy, and way off base.
Right now, some of you are lost in the maze of my mind. You do know that I am just letting thoughts fall out of my head right now, right? LOL! Yet, everything has a purpose. Purpose. Hmmmmm. Purpose. Is purpose the same thing as calling? Some people say that one way to determine what your purpose/calling is to look at the thing or things you are MOST passionate about. Sooooo, what if I'm highly passionate about pornography? What if, of all things, I'm MOST passionate about white supremacy?? So, I can't be like Clayton Bigsby?? See how this whole matter has just been made complicated by wanting to make something sound good or profound? What if one finds absolutely nothing he/she is passionate about? Does it mean they have no purpose or calling? In this arena, I suggest prayer and meditation until the proper sight is given.
We, humans, often use WAY too many words. That just comes from us wanting to sound good in front of somebody or a group, or a congregation. Sometimes the most profound thing one can say is nothing at all. Big and pretty words serve as potential snares to the ones speaking them. For once they are spoken, an expectation (often ill) is set, and actions are heavily scrutinized. Again, I'm just getting some thought out into the open.
I had about 6 hours of highway time today, and I found my mind cluttered with all sorts of thoughts. This brief brain fart has relieved some of the pressure on my brain, and I am sure more will be coming real soon. Those who have ears to hear, let them hear.
Conundrum? Me?? REALLY???
HAPPY SUNDAY NIGHT! I LOVE Y'ALL, EACH AND EVERY ONE!!
Bryan Hollomon Williams